Snape's Story
by TrilliandZaphod
Summary: Snape's childhood story, all the way through Hogwarts and to where he meets Harry Potter. Rated T for language I later chapters. Starts off in more of a diary format and then turns into more of a story
1. Chapter 1 Different, Like Me

**Hi**

 **This is Snape's childhood diary.**

 **Enjoy :)**

 **Disclaimer: I don't (unfortunately) own the HP characters, I'm just borrowing them for a bit.  
**

Dear Diary

I expected it to be another uneventful day today.

Mum and dad had another fight last night. My father had thrown my mother across the room, well, that's what I can tell by the state of the kitchen.

My mother must of hexed him multiple times, and my father punched her many times. Like most other nights.

I step over pieces of broken chair, and walk over to the fridge. It's the only functioning appliance in our kitchen. Probably because it is too big to throw.

My father is lying on the floor, asleep with a slow trickle of blood coming from his temple. Well, the fights have been worse.

I have no idea where my mother is, but she'll be back tonight to hex my father again

I don't go to help him. He never helps me when I'm in certain situations.

I open the grimy fridge and find some old rotting vegetables, bread, beer and some meat that I'd rather not touch. I grab some of the bread, a jacket and head out to the park. That park is more of my home than my house.

I like this park, as it's so old, graffiti covered and damaged, only very few people come here, and those are mostly the teenagers who come and smoke and  
do graffiti. But that's only in the evening.

You should not mess with them

It's quiet, peaceful, and I can have my own time. Alone

 _Flashback_

 _A picture of us, standing on the beach all in swimsuits, holding ice cream,_

 _we are all smiling and waving. I was only four at the time._

 _Another picture of when we went camping in the mountains._

 _We were sitting by the campfire, roasting marshmallows._

 _All pictures of us doing fun things. As a family._

 _''Severus, Severus! What are you doing! What is this!'' It's my father._

 _He snatches up the album and looks at the photos._

 _''Can I have it back please, dad?''_

 _''No Severus! These times are gone! Now get to your room! I don't want to see you!''_

 _he shouted as he threw the album into the fire._

 _The flames roar, and I see the edges of the photos curl and blacken._

 _My father slaps me very hard and storms into the kitchen_ , _probably to open another beer._

 _I run up into my room_ _before the tears start to slip from my eyes._

 _That album was the only proof that once we were a happy family._

 _I lie in bed for hours, not sleeping_

 _That next morning, I go back down to the living room._

 _There are some cracks in the walls that I had never seen before, and the tattered, threadbare armchair is flipped over on its side._

 _Another fight._

 _I step over to the fire, which is now reduced to only a few glowing embers._

 _I bend down and spot, in the grate, a small piece of paper._

 _I look at it, and see a small picture of us, when we went skiing in the mountains, one Christmas._

 _I pocket this picture. It's the last one._

I leave my small spot behind the bushes, and sit on a swing. This is basically my summer holidays.

Before school ended, I heard people talking about visiting other cities, camping, and even visiting other countries.

I wonder what I will tell the children at school when I get back. I will have to make up something. Something fun.

''Come of Lily! let's play! Come!'' I duck out of sight, because sometimes when people see me, they laugh. At me.

Two girls, the older one of the two with long, brown hair, and the younger one with red.

They ran and went on the see-saw, laughing as they went up and down. If only I had a sibling.

If I had a sibling, I could laugh and play with them. I would help them through their childhood, and then, we would go off to Hogwarts. Hogwarts. I cannot wait.

After the see saw, the red haired girl went on a slide, while the other went onto the swings.

Keeping out of sight, I walk towards the slide, where the red-haired girl Lily is.

''Hello there. My name is Severus, what's yours?'' I know I sound awful. I haven't introduced myself to somebody in a long time

'' My name is Lily. I think your clothes are weird.'' Okay, I think she's right. My clothes are dark and dirty. Not like most kids' colorful outfits.

Her sister came up the slide and looked me over. ''You smell really bad do you know, come on Lily, we need to go.''

And with that she took her sister's hand and walked off.

I don't know how I knew, but I knew she was different to the other muggles. Different to even her sister

Was she like me? A wizard? I wonder if she knows that she could be different. I think she just needs somebody to tell her.

And I plan to be that person.

 **Author's note:**

 **I really hope you enjoyed this story**

 **I will try to upload between 1 and 1 and a half weeks, as I am also writing another story.**

 **Please review, it really makes my day reading them.**

 **Until next time  
**

 **Leila :)**


	2. Chapter 2 The Plan

**Hi**

 **Here is the next part of the diary.**

 **I know that they're short, but most diary entries aren't very long**

 **Enjoy :)**

Dear Diary

I could not stop thinking about Lily, all through the night.

It is not usually so quiet in the evenings, as the silence is filled up with screams, thumps and cracks.

I am not sure how I knew that she is different, but I can tell. is

Tomorrow, I hope they come back to the park, and maybe I can have a conversation with Lily, tell her who she really is, tell her about Hogwarts  
and about spells.

Sounds like a plan.

Surprisingly, my parents didn't fight tonight, but I think that was because my mother is still gone. Gone.

I wonder if she's gone for good.

If she has, then I bet my father will be happy.

When my parents don't fight, I usually linger in my bedroom, waiting for my father to leave.

I do this, because I know that if he sees me, he'll probably hurt me. A lot.

In less than an hour, my dad is gone, probably off to the pub to spend our last few pennies on beer.

I go down, open the fridge and find it empty. Just like my stomach.

Well, it's not the first time that I have gone without eating for a while. I look inside the cupboards, whose doors are either off, or hanging on their hinges.

Nothing.

I grab my gray, dirty coat and head to the park. Nobody is there.

I hope that Lily comes. Preferably alone, but her sister will probably accompany her.

After a while, I start to here voices. ''Lily, mother said not to talk to him. He's not like the other children,''

''But Petunia, I think he has something to tell me,''

"Don't talk to him Lily. Promise me. I will let you go and play. But come back here if he's there,''

It's obvious that they are talking about me.

Lily comes, skipping in a nice red dress. She climbs onto the slide and goes down a few times.

I walk up to her. ''Hello, Lily. It's me. Remember me?''

''I remember you. My mother said not to talk to you. She said that you are strange. You are different,''

''I am different Lily, and so are you. I want to tell you something very important. Only if you promise  
not to tell anybody.''

She nodded. ''Okay, this might seem a little strange, but I think that you are like me. A wizard,''

''A wizard!'' Does that mean that I can do magic?''

''Yes Lily. And there is even a special wizard school called Hogwarts. And there are lots of wizards. There is even a ministry of magic, which is like our form of government,"

"I think you are lying, my sister told me not to trust you,"

"Lily, you must trust me. This is true,"

"I want to see a wizard. I want to see magic. To do magic,"

"Let me ask you Lily, have you done any strange things in your life? Things that have confused yourself and  
others around you?"

She thought for a moment. "Well, once I did manipulate some petals in front of my sister. She said it was  
just a gust of wind, but I tried to tell her that it wasn't. She wouldn't listen,"

"That is a form of magic, what you did with the petals that time, all children with magical abilities will often  
show them when they are very young,"

"At first, my sister wanted me to teach her how to do it. I tried, but she just couldn't. She got very frustrated,"

"Sometimes, wizard children are born from non-wizard families. Often their siblings and parents can't do magic,"

"Will I go to this wizard school?''

"Maybe you will get a letter from an owl, asking you to come. Then you will buy all you need and then you can go to the school,"

"Lily! Lily! Who are you talking to?"

"Um..."

"Her sister Petunia came, and as she saw me, her face became angry. Very angry.

"Lily! Mother told you not to talk to him! I knew I couldn't trust you!"

She grabbed her hand and dragged her back, still shouting about mother, trust and strangers.

Lily turned to look at me and I put my finger to my lips, the universal gesture to stay quiet.

Later as I walked home, it started to rain, even though it's the middle of the summer.

Typical England.

As I walked, a plan was forming in my head. I was to follow Lily home the next time I saw them.

Not necessarily to do anything, just so I knew where their home is, in case I need to contact Lily.

Not the best plan, but at least I have one.

I got home and found that my father isn't home yet. Still in the pub drinking away all our money probably.

He might even stay there overnight. Whatever, I've slept alone at home before.

In our destroyed living room, I find that the tattered and threadbare armchair has been restored to its normal,  
upright position.

On it I find a little note.

 _Dear Severus,_

 _I am writing this for two reasons, one to say sorry, and another to tell you- well, you'll understand_

 _I strongly regret almost my whole adult life._

 _I was well off at the start, until I married the pig of your father._

 _He was nice at first, especially when we had you._

 _We did so many fun things, but I don't have time to tell you now._

 _You probably wonder why we fight almost every evening._

 _Well, if you must know Severus, we fight over you._

 _The reason is a very silly reason I know, but I am going to tell you it._

But that was all there was. The rest had been ripped off. I know who the note was from though.

My mother.

 **Hi**

 **I really hope that you are enjoying. I am sorry it took me a while to upload, I have been very busy.**

 **Hopefully, my uploads will come faster, but I'm not making any promises :)**

 **See you next time,**

 **Leila :)**


	3. Chapter 3 The Dream

**Hello there!**

 **I'm back with another diary entry, thanks to all of you who are sticking by and reading, I really appreciate it.**

 **Enjoy :)**

I have to read the letter a few times to take it in.

There wasn't much information, but it was enough.

It just gives me so many questions. Where is the rest of the letter? Who ripped it? What else did she want to tell me? Where is she now?

But, most importantly, why do they fight over me?

I try to think why they might fight over me. Is it something I've done?

My train of thought was lost though, as my father snatched the letter from my hand.

''Severus! Where did you get this?'' his piggy eyes scanned the short letter. ''I found it on the armchair,'' I said, pointing at the seat of the tattered armchair.

His eyes flicked to that spot, and then back to me, ''When did you find this?''

''I found it just now. On the chair, as I said.''

''Where is the rest of the letter?''

''It was like this when I found it, dad,'' I answered, hesitating slightly on the last word.

 _Dad_. I can't think how long it's been since I've used that word.

''I think you're lying. Empty your pockets. Now.'' Even though it was a command, I could hear slight desperation in his voice.

Turning out all my pockets, I found nothing. I don't really have much to put in them anyway.

''Hmm. Maybe you were telling the truth. Go. Your room. Now.''

''But, dad, I want to find out why the letter is ripped.''

''Room. Now!''

I run upstairs, shut the door and locked it behind me. I sit on the bed with a tsunami of thoughts rushing through my head.

I don't even try to sleep.

In a while, I hear my dad stomping up the stairs. I hear him hesitate in front of my door, like he was going to enter

But he didn't.

Somehow, in a short time, I slip into the pleasant land of sleep and dreams.

 _It is a lovely summer's day, and I was walking down a cobbled path, my brain full of good feelings._

 _On the sides of the path, there were tall, green Cyprus trees, their leaves rippling in the gentle breeze._

 _Nothing can stop me. Nothing will even try to.  
_

 _In a short while, I see some clouds, gently blowing along, slowly filling up the bright blue sky_

 _It was clouding over. But that won't stop me.  
_

 _Soon, the sun was obscured by the slowly darkening clouds._

 _This day isn't perfect anymore._

 _Slowly, the wind picks up, making the trees look like they are dancing._

 _It is starting to rain, slowly at first; just a drizzle, but then growing harder_

 _Rain drips down the back of my collar, making cold shivers run down my body  
_

 _The wind whips through the trees, making a sound like howling wolves._

 _The once dry cobbled path is covered with puddles and wet leaves, making it very slippery._

 _The puddles are starting to freeze, as the temperature drops even lower  
_

 _I slip and stumble, still determined to reach my goal.  
_

 _''Severus! Severus!'' I hear a voice, that I instantly recognize as my mother's, screaming my name. I try to run, but the path is too slippery so I fall._

 _''Severus! Please! I need-''_

 _''Mo-ther!'' I couldn't speak, as the saliva in my throat was starting to freeze from the cold_

 _I the loud crack of a whip and some laughter._

 _My mother's screams are almost reduced to raspy whispers, that I can only hear because of the wind._

 _''Severus,'' I hear my name echo all around, as I lie there, helpless.  
_

 _Helpless_

I jolt up in my bed, sweat poring down my forehead and my heart racing.

''Calm down, it is only a dream, calm down,'' I say to myself in between of my rushed breaths.

I glanced at my cracked wall clock- 7:04. Would my dad be out yet?

I slowly open my bedroom door, and listen.

''He-he's fine. Yes he's very fine. No, you can't see him, as he's...asleep,'' says my father

''Asleep?'' I don't recognise this man's voice

''Yes. Got a problem with that?''

''No. But I want to see him. Wake him up.''

''I don't want to disturb him,''

''Just check to see if he's asleep. If not, bring him.''

As my father plods up the stairs, I jump back into bed and throw the covers over myself, pretending to be asleep.

''Severus? Are you awake?''

He peeks around the door and looks in my direction.

I don't move. He closes the door and goes back down the stairs. ''I'm sorry. He is asleep,''

The man grunted. ''You disappoint me.'' And with that he left.

In a little while, my dad left to who knows where. My best guess is the pub

When I leave, I am thinking about my dream.

In the beginning, it is a warm summers day, and I am walking to somewhere. I had the feeling of reaching some sort of goal.

Then it slowly got cloudy and the weather got worse, and in the end, I couldn't move or speak.

I heard my mother being whipped by someone, but I don't know who it was.

And also, who was my dad talking to? They wanted to see me for some reason. I have no idea why.

The weather was a pleasant temperature, it is summer after all, but here in England, some summers can be quite cold.

I trudge, once again to the dank, dirty park.

Sitting one on of the swings was Lily, wearing a long, thin jacket, and staring at the ground

''I don't know weather I should trust you or not,'' said Lily, not looking up

''It's your choice, but you're eleven years old, right?''

''Yes,''

''Then your Hogwarts letter will be coming soon, since you have magical abilities. You will come  
to King's Cross station, enter platform 9 3/4, and get onto the Hogwarts Express.  
Then, you will become a witch.''

''I know, you've told me all that, but I am, not sure if I can trust you,''

''You can Lily, you can. Just wait and see. Be patient,''

''I'm going now. See you... later Severus,''

She turned and walked off. It is now time to put the plan into action.

I followed her.

Staying out of sight, I watched her go and followed her. I ducked behind trees in case she would look back.

She didn't.

In a little while, we approached a large house with a big garden, complete with gnomes and bird feeders.

Lily went towards the door and turned around.

I was hidden behind a large bush, out of her sight.

She knocked and entered her house.

And I stayed hidden in the bushes.

 **Hi there!**

 **I just want to say, that I won't be continuing until I get some more reviews on this story.**

 **I know it's annoying, but I only have one.**

 **So, if you want the next chapter, review.**

 **Leila**


	4. Chapter 4 A Promise

**Hi there!**

 **I know it's been a while, but I am finally back with chapter 4**

 **Enjoy**

I watched Lily enter her house from my hidden spot in the bushes

What am I to do now?

I obviously didn't think this through well enough.

I sneak closer and go up against the wooden fence surrounding the garden.

I peek in and see them starting a game of Monopoly, Lily taking her first turn

I find it hard not to tear up at the sight of a happy family playing board games.

It's not like I've ever had such an experience, but there's nothing I wouldn't give to play games like that with  
my family

I hear them all laugh out loud when one of them must of made a joke.

I can hardly remember the last time I laughed myself, let alone with my parents

I'm not sure if I can watch them for much longer without crying.

I look away from the room and head back, a chilly breeze blowing.

Just like in my dream, at first this day was perfect, and now I want to cry.

I trudge all the way back to my house, and I can already hear loud shouts and thumps, and through  
the dirty window I can see a flash of red light.

I don't enter. But now I know that my mother isn't gone for good.

''I don't wa-''

''I thought that even as pig-headed as you are, you wouldn't do this!'' screamed my mother, sending another  
hex at him

''Bu- I didn't mea-''

''I don't want to hear your-'' but she didn't finish her sentence as my father slammed her against the grimy wall.

"Get out! Get OWWWWW!'' my father screamed as my mother set his shirt on fire.

I am not sure if I can handle this any longer. I burst through the open door. ''Stop it! Stop it!''

''Severus?'' They both say in unison

''Stop this. Forever. You're ruining my life, you know that? Other families are united, they help each other. They love each other. They show love, caring and affection towards each other. Look at yourselves. Look at what you have done. I have seen photos, photos in which we were a happy family. But look at us now.''

It was very hard to say that. I am not sure weather I should regret it.

We were all silent for the longest time. Then, my mother went upstairs, not saying a word.

My father scratched his unshaven chin and looked at me.

For a while, we stared at each other. He started towards me, and I couldn't move or back away

As he got closer, he raised his hand as if he was about to hit me. But he didn't

''Go. Bed.'' he grunted to me. I obeyed.

In bed, I lay thinking. I thought about my parent's reaction to what I said, While I was thinking, I realized  
that that was the first time I had actually seen my parents together, in the same room.

I also thought about the man who came yesterday, asking to see me. Who is he?

Somehow, I slipped into the void of sleep.

 _I wake up in a white room, all the walls completely blank, except for one, which is made of glass_

 _I walk over to the glass, and I see my mother, lying on her back, possibly asleep_

 _I knock on the glass to try and wake her. ''Mother, mother,''_

 _She doesn't stir._

 _I pound harder on the glass and shout, "Mother! Wake up! Mother!"_

 _''You're too late,'' says a voice behind me. I spin round, but there is no one there_

 _''She's already gone,'' says the voice again. I turn around, but there is nobody there_

 _''Who are you? Where are you?'' I ask_

 _''That doesn't matter. What matters is that she's gone. Long gone,''_

 _I look at my mother lying on the floor she seems dead_

 _''I feel some tears slipping down my face_

 _''Mother, No! Mother!'' I say, pounding on the glass. "Mother!"_

I wake up from the nightmare, my face wet with tears.

Why am I having all these nightmares? Is there something wrong with me?

I open the dirty door of my bedroom and start down the creaky steps

In the practically destroyed kitchen, my father is sitting on a chair, holding a chipped, dirty mug, filled with brown liquid

"I have so many regrets," he said, not looking up. "When we married, we made a commitment,  
we bonded together for life."

I don't say anything.

"We started raising you. It was perfect. We were all happy. We thought nothing could go wrong." he said, more to himself than me

"But then, it all did. We started arguing. Those arguments turned into fights. I wanted to say sorry, but my drunken, stupid self would take over and fight."

"But now, she's gone. Probably for good.''

''Dad. She's not gone. She will return. Maybe in years, when I'm in Hogwarts.''

He said nothing

"Dad, I want you to promise me, you can come back and hit me later, but promise me that when mother comes back. You will say sorry."

"Severus-"

"Promise me dad, promise me. Please,''

He sighed a deep, heavy sigh. "I promise.''

"Good." I want to hug him, but I know that he's not at all the hugging type.

I head out without another word.

I head to the park, then stop as I come to the clearing. I turn around and head in another direction.

For the first time in ages, I feel something small, sparking inside me. A feeling. An emotion

It is sad how I almost forgot about this emotion, but now that I feel it, I can remember what it is like.

Happiness

I feel like going somewhere new today.

 **Hey There!**

 **I hope you enjoyed the chapter**

 **Just a word of warning, I will be wrapping up this diary in the next 3-4 chapters**

 **See you next time,**

 **Leila**


	5. Chapter 5 Letters

**Hi!**

 **Here I am again with another diary entry**

 **Enjoy :)**

It is not often that I decide to go somewhere new. My house is on the outskirts of London, but if I took the underground, I could get in

The only problem is that I don't have much muggle money, so the underground would be a little hard

I walk back home. I go up to my damp, dirty room and start to hunt for money.

As I am searching, I hear a tap on my window. I look over

It is a brown barn owl, holding an envelope.

My Hogwarts letter!

I open the rusty window and grab my letter

The owl holds out its leg which has a small, leather pouch on it

"Tips," it read. I grab 3 knuts from my small, old wallet and put it in the pouch.

The owl hooted and flew off.

I sit on my bed and open up the letter, written in fancy cursive

 _Dear Severus  
_

 _We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry  
_

 _Enclosed is a letter containing what you must bring to your first year, and all of these supplies can be bought at Diagon Alley  
_

 _We await your returning owl by the 25th of August_

 _Signed, Armando Dippet, headmaster._

I am so happy to get my letter. Has Lily got one as well? She probably has.

I don't have an owl, and nor does she, but we can send our letters from the post office in Diagon Alley

I need to get to Lily, it's very important that I go now, as she has probably just got her letter

I grab my muggle and wizard money and run out to Lily's house

It takes me a while to get there, but when I arrive, I see her sitting in her garden outside her house, reading the letter, with a snowy owl pecking at her

''Severus! Can you please get this owl away! It's annoying!''

"We need an owl to reply to our letters. I look at the owl. Please, can you wait there? I will give you extra money if you will take our replies.''

The owl flies and sits on a fence, waiting.

"So, I've been invited to Hogwarts. It is real then."

"Of course it's real. I have one too," I say, taking out my own letter and showing it to her

''Where can I buy wands? And cauldrons? It says Diagon Alley, but I don't know where that is,"

"Of course you don't. Diagon Alley is a special place with many wizard shops, where you can buy everything on that list.''

"I wonder what my parents will think. My sister Petunia never got one. I think she'll be jealous."

"Of course she will be jealous. You will be able to do things that she couldn't dream of. You will be better than them.''

Lily frowned slightly at this statement. ''My mum said that in our house, we are all equal, and we should all treat each other as we would want to be treated,''

This one statement almost makes me want to cry.

''Look. I can take you to Diagon Alley. We just need to get into London, but I have enough money. My parents have wizard money, and you can also change your money for wizard money.''

''I don't know what my parents will think, though.''

''Now, your family doesn't matter as much. As soon as you step into Hogwarts, you will become one of us.''

''How do I reply? And also, what is this weird paper?''

''That is parchment, what people write on in the wizard world. And to reply, just write a letter saying that you accept, and that you will come on September the first.''

''Okay. I will come.'' She says. I find myself smiling, something I haven't done in a while. She smiles back. ''I'll go and get some papers and pens.'' she says, going into her house

She comes back, and we write our replies and give them to white owl, as well as a galleon in its little pouch.

''Now what?'' asks Lily

''Now, we plan when we go to Diagon Alley,'' I say

''Tomorrow?'' asks Lily

''Sounds good,'' I reply

''Make sure you bring all your money and your list. Don't forget the list.''

''Do you know how to get into Diagon Alley?''

''Yes. You need to go into a certain pub in London, then tap a brick on a wall with a wand.''

''Do you have a wand?"

"No, but I know what to do without one. Don't worry Lily. I know what to do.''

''Okay, I just want to make sure.''

''See you tomorrow, then.''

''Wait. Should I tell my parents?''

''Tell them about the letter. Tell them that you get everything you need at school.''

''What about my absence tomorrow?''

I think for a moment. ''Tell them you are going on a picnic with your friends, and tell them that it will be a whole day event.''

''Okay. Thanks Severus.'' she says, with another sweet smile that makes my heart leap.

''Lets meet at the park, at eight o'clock tomorrow.'' I say. See you then

''See you!'' says Lily, and she goes back into her house.

I walk to the park, going over the conversation in my head. I cannot wait for tomorrow.

I don't have much else to do, so after a while, I go back home.

I go into the living room, and instinctively look around, even though there is no change in the room.

I have no idea where my father is, but he is probably in a betting shop or pub, spending the rest of our money.

Since I don't have much else to do, I pick up one of my mother's magic books. After dusting off the cover, I see the title. _Hogwarts, a History_.

Since I am going to Hogwarts, it is probably suitable to read this now.

I really cannot wait until tomorrow.

 **Hi there!**

 **I know it's mean to end on a cliffhanger, but I want to say, that if I don't get another review, I will cancel this story.**

 **So, I am kind of blackmailing you.**

 **Until next time,**

 **Leila**


	6. Chapter 6 Diagon Alley (part one)

**Hi!**

 **Here I am with the next entry of Snape's diary**

 **Enjoy :)**

 **Disclaimer: All the characters belong to J.K Rowling, but the story is mine**

I wake up, after a long day of waiting yesterday. I check my dusty clock. It shows 7:30, so I have half an hour to get ready.

I pull on some clothes that aren't as dirty as some and go downstairs.

For some reason, every time I go downstairs, I expect something to change, I expect my parents to be there, I expect for the room to be clean.

It never is. I don't know why I always expect that I just can't help it.

I go to the fireplace and light it. Lily and I can travel to Diagon Alley using Floo powder.

I open the fridge, which is still working, surprisingly. From what I can see from the dusty, blinking light, it's empty.

I go out to the park and sit on a swing, waiting. After what feels like forever, Lily arrives, today in a red shirt and jean shorts.

''Shall we go?'' she asks ''Yes, lets.''

''How will we travel?''

"In the wizarding world, we have a form of travel using fireplaces and powder called Floo powder. Come, I'll tell you more,'' we start to walk to my house

''We light the fire, then we throw this special powder in. Once you step into the fire, say the place we want to go, then we get there.''

''Okay. So, where will it take us?''

"There is a pub near the entrance to Diagon Alley. We can go there then enter.''

''Do you have your money?'' I ask

''Yes. Do you?''

''My parents let me take what we have from their bank. And you can change your money,'' I say

We start to approach my house. ''Be prepared for a small shock,'' I say as we enter my house

It takes Lily a few moments to take it all in. ''How do you live here? It's so dirty!''

''We manage. Now, come here.'' I say, gesturing to my fireplace, which I had lit earlier. I had already found the small bag of powder

''So, you take some powder and throw it in. When the flames turn green, you step in. Don't worry, it won't hurt. Then say loudly and clearly: The Leaky Cauldron,''

''The Leaky Cauldron,'' she replied

''Do you want to go first?''

Lily looks a bit scared. ''Okay,'' she said, trying to hide her nervousness

''When you get there, you will feel a bit disorientated. But make sure you stand out of the way, as I will come. Take some powder.'' I said, handing her the bag

After throwing some powder and stepping into the green flames, she turned to face me. ''See you on the other side,'' I said

''The Leaky Cauldron,'' she said, loud and clear. She vanished.

I threw in some more powder and stepped in. ''The Leaky Cauldron,'' I said and vanished.

The sensation is very disorientating, to say the least. I really cannot describe it.

As I arrive, I see Lily standing there, swaying slightly. I step out very dizzy

''Alright?'' I ask. She nods. There aren't many people in the bar, only a few chatting quietly at their tables.

There is a sign on the fireplace, so faded that it is almost unreadable. _If you use fireplace, tip the bar_

I stumble over and put two sickles on the bar. ''Thank you. Now, where are your parents?'' He asked. I hadn't thought of that one

''Um- at home?''

''Good enough. I suppose you're here to get your Hogwarts supplies?'' I nod in reply

''Got a wand?''

''No.''

''Well, I'll let you two in. Come.'' He takes us out a back door and touches his wand to a brick on the wall. The wall opens up, leaving us a space to walk through

''Thank you,'' I say. Come on Lily. Welcome to Diagon Alley.''

I had never been here before, and just like Lily, I wanted to see everything at once.

There were shops for everything, from books to robes to amazing broomsticks.

"So, where should we start?'' Asks Lily

''Firstly, we need to get money from the bank. It's a big, white building called Gringotts.''

After walking for a while, we get to the bank. We enter the big building.

We queue up at a desk with a goblin sitting behind it. ''What can I do for you?'' asks the goblin

''We want to change some muggle money and take some out from vault 124,'' I say

''Give me the money,'' he says

''Lily, give him your money,'' I say. She puts almost all of her money on the desk.

''What is a muggle?'' She whispers to me.

''It's our name for non-magical people,'' I reply

''Here is your money, a total of thirty-three galleons and ten sickles. And you said you want to go to vault 124?''

"Yes, I do,''

''Follow me.'' The goblin got down and we went over to a door. ''I must warn you, you might feel a little sick, I can assure you that it's perfectly safe.''

The goblin led us to a small minecart, holding up a lantern for light

"Hold on tight." He said as we step into the rusty mine cart. We grip on to the sides as the goblin pulls a lever and off we go.

The ride is full of twists and turns that cause us to lose our balance. As well as the sharp turns, the minecart is moving very fast, giving us motion sickness.

I see Lily standing next to me with her eyes closed and her knuckles white from holding on.

After about a minute, the minecart slows to a stop with a screeching sound.

Lily opens her eyes and we look around. The minecart is parked in front of a big door with the number 124 on it.

''Here we are,'' said the goblin, gesturing me to step out of the cart. Lily stayed in

The goblin stuck the little key into the lock and turned it clockwise. The door then opened and I step inside.

There isn't much money in the vault, but I gather what's there and put it into a bag.

"Alright," said the goblin. "Back we go!" We get back into the minecart and start moving again.

When we get back, Lily and I are a quite dizzy. After uttering brief thank-yous, we exit and collapse onto a nearby bench.

"That was something that I never want experience again," said Lily. We sit there for a few minutes in silence

"So, should we go?" I ask, "We do have lots to buy,"

"Yes. Let's go." She replied, and we get up, ready to begin our school shopping.

 **Hello again!**

 **So, that concludes this next entry, I know it's mean to end on a cliffhanger, but don't worry, the next one is coming soon**

 **I'm pissed because NO REVIEWS. Thank you to those who have favourited, followed and reviewed, it's much appreaciated**

 **See you next time,**

 **Leila**


	7. Chapter 7 Diagon Alley (part two)

**Hi**

 **Back with another entry, I hope you're enjoying this, as it is quite fun to write**

 **Enjoy**

We get up and start to walk around. "Where do you buy cauldrons?" Lily asks, "Or scales or crystal phials?"

"I'm not too sure, but I think in an apothecary because they sell potion ingredients. Let's take a look." We enter the apothecary and Lily immediately goes to look at some potion ingredients

I go over to the cauldrons and find the ones we need: pewter and size two. I take a couple off the shelf and go over to Lily who reading about felis felicis.

"Do you know about this potion? It's a luck potion. Very expensive."

"I've heard of it, but never seen it," I say. "We should get going, we have lots to buy."

Lily tore her eyes away from the potion. "You're right, we have lots to do today, "

We go to the shelf with the scales and we pick some up.

Don't we also need crystal phials?" Asks Lily.

"Oh yeah, I'll get them," I say, going over to the shelf with them.

I grab the cheapest phials off the shelf and we go over to the till.

"That will be fourteen Galleons please," she says. We each put seven galleons on the counter.

"Have a nice day!" She says as we leave the shop. "Well, one shop down, "

"And lots more to go, " I say. "Come on. I can see a robe shop over there. That can be our next shop."

We enter the robe shop where we see another boy waiting for his robes.

"Sirius Black. Nice to meet you,"

"I'm Lily, and this is Severus,"

"Severus... " He said as if waiting for something else

"Snape," I say

"Nice girlfriend you got there, Snape, "

"Leave him alone, he's not my boyfriend,"

"So you're up for grabs? I think I'll have two,"

Lily gives the grinning Sirius a look.

"Look, Lily and I have lots to do so-"

"Alright, I'll leave you to it. Enjoy your little date, "

"Didn't you get the message? Lily is not my girlfriend. Full stop."

"Is making jokes illegal now? If it is, they'd give me a lifetime in Azkaban. "

"Hello, you two. I suppose you want Hogwarts robes?" Said a woman who was presumably the shopkeeper

"Yes, " I say, relieved to have someone other than Sirius to talk to.

"Alright, both of you stand over here and wait a moment, I just have to collect Sirius' money.

She collected Sirius' money. "I suppose I'll see you guys at Hogwarts," Sirius said.

"I suppose so, " said Lily. Sirius gave us a wave and left the shop.

The shopkeeper measured us and went to get our robes.

"What do these robes look like?" Asks Lily

"They're just long, black robes. What all witches and wizards wear,"

"Do we get a hat? "

"I'm pretty sure we do," I reply.

The shopkeeper returns carrying two black bundles of robes, each with a pointy hat.

"Alright, here you go," she said, handing them to us. "Normally, they would be fifteen Galleons each, but there is an offer, so they are ten each, please.

We hand her the money and leave.

"How do I look?" Lily asks, trying on her hat.

"Um, nice," I say.

"We need books, right?"

"Yes," I reply, "I think the bookshop is called Flourish and Blots,"

We enter the shop which Is full of kids with their families, buying books.

"I know, lets split up," I say, "You go and get The Standard Book of Spells, History of Magic, Magical Theory and a beginners guide to transfiguration. I'll get the other ones."

"Sounds good," said Lily and she went and started searching. I glanced at my list and then went to look for the potions book: Magical Drafts and Potions.

"Sev, you already lost your girlfriend?" Said Sirius. I already hate that guy.

I decide to ignore him by picking up a random book and reading it.

"Sevy!"

I continue to ignore him, even though he called me Sevy.

"Come on bro, just because you-"

"Sirius, go away!" Lily came up to us, her arms full of books.

"Lily, why did you split up with him? He seems so nice!"

"Sirius, please, Go Away!" You could here the capitalised letters in her voice.

"Alright, Alright," said Sirius, raising his hands. "I'll go. See you in Hogwarts."

"And not before," I say.

Sirius walks off, laughing.

"So, did you find the books?"

"I found Year of the Yeti apparently."

"Do we need it?"

"No,"

"Look, it's easy, there are shelf guides. Give me a moment and I'll find them,"

I leave Lily to it and I go to a Sirius-free part of the shop and start randomly scanning the shelf. My stomach rumbles.

Less than five minutes later, Lily comes, a large pile of books in her arms.

"Take some of these please," says Lily, dumping the books on me.

"Shall we go and pay?" I ask

"Yes, we should," says Lily.

We go over to the counter and dump our books on it.

"You both going to Hogwarts?" She asks. We nod.

Right, that will be... seventeen galleons each."

We put our money on the counter. "Thank you," she says. I suppose you'll want a bag?"

"Yes," I say. She pulls out a small bag and puts all our books inside it, somehow fitting them all.

"How..."

"Invisible extension. Works like a charm," she said, chuckling a little at her own joke.

We exit the shop, Lily holding the bag.

"I'm hungry," she says.

"Me too. There should be an ice cream place somewhere," I say.

We walk on a little. "Here it is," I say, "Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour,"

"Yum," says Lily and we go in.

We order our ice creams, pay, and sit down outside.

"Mmm, this ice cream is delicious, the best I've ever had,"

"It has been so long since I've had ice cream, I've almost forgotten the taste,"

"When was the last time you had ice cream?"

"Um, that's not important," I say. I don't want her to know, I really don't.

"No, seriously, most kids go out with their parents and eat ice cream,"

"Well-"

"Is there something you're hiding?"

"Lily-"

"Severus, you can tell me. What is so different about you?"

I don't answer. I also don't have any more appetite.

"Look, my parents are both lactose intolerant, so we don't get ice cream," I can tell she's not convinced.

"Okay," she says, going back to her ice cream. I don't want mine anymore.

 **Hey there!**

 **I know this chapter took a while, but I've had no more reviews.**

 **Seriously guys, show some love, write a review! It literally takes five seconds!**

 **Okay, I must calm down.**

 **Next time, Leila**


	8. Chapter 8 Wands

**Hey** **there**

 **Guys, I think that I have been taking you for granted too much. You have been amazing, giving me loads of reviews and love.  
**

 **I** **know I haven't uploaded in ages, but have exams coming up and I need to study, because I do have a life.**

 **Just kidding, I don't.**

"Have we gotten everything we need?" Asks Lily once she finished her ice cream.

"Well, I know that you're allowed to bring a pet to Hogwarts,"

"Ooh, I'd love a cat," says Lily

"Well, it looks like you have enough money," I say

"Well, let's go to the pet shop, see what there is,"

"We leave the ice cream shop and walk the short way to the pet shop.

We enter the shop after looking at the owls in the window.

Lily goes straight to where the cats are and starts looking at them and petting them.

I go up to the counter. "What's the cheapest pet here?" I ask.

"Toads," says the woman behind the counter, "But you can't do much with 'em," she says

I go over to the toad cages and start to look at them

"Considering a toad?" It was Lily, holding a fat, orange cat.

"Well, I don't know," I say, "They're pretty cheap, I think I could afford one," I say.

I scan the cage once more, considering it. "Hurry up," said Lily, "Are you getting one or not?"

I open the cage and slowly put my hand in. One toad crawled towards my hand and then hopped on top of it.

"Looks like 'he's chosen you, sonny," she said.

I slowly remove my hand and the toad doesn't move.

We slowly walk towards the counter. "Right," she said. "Twenty galleons on total please, fourteen for the cat and six for the toad.

We hand her the money and leave the shop.

"We still need to get the most important thing," I say, putting the toad in my pocket

"And what's that?" She asks, even though I know she already knows the answer

"Wands," I say.

We get up and start to walk towards Ollivander's, the wand shop.

We enter the shop and we are greeted by a shy twinkling bell hidden in the shop. We saw nothing except one small, spindly chair and lots and lots of dust.

"Hello?" Says Lily.

We hear movement and someone comes out.

"Hello, children. My name is Mr Ollivander. I suppose you want wands?"

"Yes," I say.

"Alright. Who wants to go first?"

Lily steps forward confidently. "I will go, sir," she says.

"What is your name?" He asks.

"Lily," she says. "I'm what you would call muggle-born,"

"Just because you're muggle born, it doesn't mean that you won't produce great results."

"So, do I choose one?

"The wand chooses the wizard my dear. You will try some and the best one will be yours,"

Ollivander walks over to a tall shelf and takes a long thin box down.

"7 inches, elm wood, dragon heartstring. Which is your dominant hand?"

"Right," she says. He hands her the wand.

Lily gives the wand a swish. A bang goes off in the shop, making lots of papers fall down.

"Oh well, not that one then," he said, as if this kind of thing happened every day.

He put the wand back in the box and returned it to the shelf.

"Maybe this one instead. Ten inches, willow, unicorn hair core.

Lily took the long wand and swished it. There was a puff of purple dust and petals fell onto the floor.

Mr Ollivander smiled.

"Well, miss Lily, I think the wand has found you. It's a nice wand, rather swishy I believe,"

Lily also smiled and stepped back, holding her new wand.

"What's your name young man?" He asks me.

"Severus," I reply.

He walks over to a different shelf this time and pulls down another box.

"Try this one Severus. Eight inches, oak, veela hair core.

I take the wand in my left hand, my dominant one. I give it a swish. Nothing happened.

"Okay, veela hair is definitely not for you,"

"Why did it not do anything?" I ask.

"That means that the wand is the opposite of what you need, it won't even do anything. Give it to me, it probably doesn't like being in your hand."

I hand back the wand.

"This one might be better. Eleven inches, dragon heartstring, pine.

I again take the long wand and swish it again. Suddenly, one of the tall shelves falls down, sending wand boxes and wood everywhere. Lily gasps.

"Don't worry, the wands won't break when they are in those boxes. As for the shelf, that's easy to fix,"

Ollivander waved his wand and she shelf rebuilt itself and all the boxes neatly repositioned themselves onto the shelf.

"Alright, I know what you need young man," he says.

"This one might be better. Ten and a half inches, blackthorn wood, Phoenix feather."

I carefully take the wand and give it a swish, scared of what might happen.

Suddenly, a few orange sparks erupted from my wand and flew upwards and disappeared.

Ollivander beamed. "I don't think any wand could be better for you, sonny. It's found you."

"Alright, the wands are ten galleons each, but I'll make them nine. We pay our money and leave the shop.

"Right, I'm all out of wizard money," says Lily

"I only have enough to tip the bar on our way home," I say.

We make our way back to the Leaky Cauldron.

"You having anything or just travelling?"

"Travelling," I say, putting down a galleon onto the bar.

We walk over to the fireplace. I throw in some of the powder, making the fire turn green.

"What do I have to say?" Asks Lily.

"Number fourteen, Greenwood Alley."

Lily boldly steps into the roaring flames.

"Number fourteen, Greenwood Alley," she says and vanishes.

I next throw in my powder and step in. I say my address and off I go

I return to my home and step out of the fireplace.

"Well that was fun," says Lily, dumping her stuff onto my tattered sofa.

"Certainly," I say.

"When does the Hogwarts train leave?"

"September the first, twelve o'clock sharp."

"Oh my goodness! That's in two days!"

"Your parents know, right?"

"Yes. They seemed happy for me once they got over the shock,"

"Can your parents take you to Kings Cross?" I ask.

"Yes, don't worry. You?"

"I'll figure something out. I'll take the Night bus or something."

"The Night bus?"

"The wizard's public transport," I say.

"I suppose we should meet at King's Cross in two days?"

"Yes. Don't forget,"

"I won't," she says. "Anyway, I need to go home. See you then!"

"Yes, see you then!"

Lily leaves my home.

 **So, that's the end of their visit to Diagon Alley, what do you think?**

 **The next chapter will probably be the last, I know it's annoying, but I can't continue it forever.**

 **Bye for now,**

 **Leila**


	9. Chapter 9 Night Bus

**Hi guys!**

 **So I did say that last chapter I would finish here, but I might not, we'll see**

Today's the day. September the first.

The day when I go to Hogwarts. The day I leave home.

I go downstairs and find my father there, lying on the floor, asleep.

"Dad!" I shake his shoulder and he wakes up.

"Severus-"

"Dad, it's September the first. I'm going to Hogwarts."

"How are you meant to get there?"

"Since when has that ever been your concern?"

"Since now. How are you going to get there?"

"The Night bus," I say firmly.

"But, don't you need to buy things, go to Diagon Alley-"

"Look, dad, while you've been drunk, I went to Diagon Alley. I am all packed. I need to leave,"

"Okay, but I have one last question. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you didn't care!" I find myself losing control. "You have just been going to the pub day after day, drinking and betting our money away. Because of you, mother's gone and I have to parent myself just like I've always done. Whenever I've needed your help or contribution, you've never given it to me. I am used to growing up that way now, and I won't change. Just forget about me, I'm going off to Hogwarts."

My father says nothing, he just looked at me. His look said enough, as it contained sorrow, despair and regret.

I walk into the kitchen and look around for something to eat. There is nothing.

I go back upstairs, passing my father without a word. I get dressed and start to pack my things in the old trunk my mother had used when she went to Hogwarts.

I pack all the stuff we bought in Diagon Alley, a few muggle clothes, and my last picture.

My last picture of my family being happy. Being united.

I put my toad in my pocket and drag the trunk down the stairs and go outside, passing my dad without another word.

I go outside with my trunk and stand out on the rotting wooden doorstep. The Night bus is meant to know when a wizard needs it and so it comes.

I stood outside for a few minutes, waiting for the bus come to a halt outside my door. Just when I was going to go back inside, I hear the loud sound of the bus come to a screeching halt outside my door.

I expect my dad to come out to see what the noise is but he didn't.

"Hello sonny, need a trip?" Said the conductor. "Come on, we haven't got all day, yes or no?"

"Yes please," I say. He helps me lift my trunk onto the bus.

Suddenly, I realise something. I don't have any money.

"Alright," said the conductor. "It costs five galleons if you just want a bed and six if you want some cold chocolate,"

"Cold chocolate?"

"It used to be hot chocolate, but it went cold,"

"Ah," I say.

"So, which one are you going for?"

"Um..." I say, unable to think of what to do.

"Severus, Severus, wait!"

"Dad?" I say, a little shocked. He was running out of the house still in his old and tattered dressing gown.

"I think your mother would have wanted to give you this," he said, handing me an envelope with my name written on it.

I open up the envelope and there are some pieces of paper and some galleons in it.

"Good luck Severus, your mother would be proud," said my dad, smiling, which I haven't seen him do in a while.

The doors closed. There was no going back.

"Come on Jerry, get the bus moving," shouted the conductor.

The bus started moving and it's speed quickly increased, probably going high above the speed limit.

I hand the conductor five galleons as I don't really fancy the idea of old, cold chocolate.

I go to the free bed and lie down in it as recommended by the various signs on the roof.

The bus swerves round a corner, sending all the beds sliding to one side of the bus. Miraculously, the conductor remains standing.

"Make sure you hold on!" Said the conductor, leaning to the side and still holding on.

"Where do you want to go kid?" He asked.

"King's Cross station," I say, trying not to throw up.

"Hear that Jerry, King's Cross station!" He shouted. The bus swerved around another corner, sending all the beds and my trunk sliding to the other side.

After about ten more minutes, the bus stopped so abruptly that everything skidded forward.

"Here we are, I'll help you with that trunk,"

Together we lower my trunk down off the bus and onto the ground.

"Good luck sonny," said the conductor giving me a toothy grin.

I put my heavy trunk onto a trolley and I push it into the station.

In the letter from Hogwarts they had given me a platform nine and three quarters ticket so I just walked straight past the ticket office and out onto the platforms.

I push my trolley all the way to platform nine and ten.

I am a bit unsure of how to get to platform nine and three quarters, but I am sure that there will be other wizard families there.

When I get there I see Lily standing there with her family She seems to be arguing with her sister.

"She _always_ gets the best, always gets the privileges. It's not fair, while Lily is going to go to this Hogwatch place, I will continue to go to this crappy high school. It's never fair,"

"Look Petunia, I really wish you could come, but for some reason professor Dumbledore didn't send you a letter. I have no idea why. And also, it's _Hogwarts_ "

"Girls, stop arguing, Lily you have to get onto the special platform. Do you know how?" Said Lily's mother.

"No," she said. "I'll figure it out,"

"Alright, have fun sweetie," said her mother, hugging her.

"I'll write every week," she said, turning to hug her dad.

After Lily had said goodbye to all of her family she came to me.

"So, how do you get onto this special platform?" She asked me.

"I have no idea," I say.

We see a big family, coming along with trolleys and most of them have owls.

"I think that's a wizard family," I say, pointing at them. "They probably know how to get onto the platform,"

"Let's ask them then," she said. We wait for them to come over.

"Are you two trying to get onto the platform?" Says the red-haired mother

We nod.

"Alright, we can show you. Molly here is also just starting out,"

Molly gave us a shy wave and smile.

"So what you need to do is run straight at that wall there with your trolley," she said, pointing at the wall between platforms nine and ten.

Lily looks a little startled, as it isn't every day that a stranger tells you to run at a brick wall.

One of her sons turns to face the brick wall.

"Watch John as he does it. It's best to take a run up,"

John ran with his trolley and disappeared through the brick wall.

"Easy peasy," she says. "Who wants to go first?"

Lily steps forward. "I will," she says. She is obviously a lot braver than me.

"I'll wait on the other side," she says to me. Bravely, she runs forward through the wall.

"Alright dear, you're turn, go quickly or you'll be late for the train,"

I stand in front of the wall and run. I feel myself going through the wall and then coming out on the other side. I am on the other side.

Platform nine and three quarters is full of wizarding families and of course the big, red Hogwarts express.

"Come on," said Lily, "Train leaves in two minutes!"

We run towards the train, the first step of our journey.

 **I'm sorry it's been a while, but the good news is that I will have a few more chapters until we close.**

 **Until next time,**

 **Leila**


	10. Chapter 10 Welcome to Hogwarts

**Hey everyone!**

 **So here we have chapter ten, our first milestone. Yay!**

 **I think now is a good moment to thank all of you guys for the supportive reviews, it makes me so happy to see them. Thank you so much.**

 **S** **o I estimate that there will be about two or three chapters after this, but we'll have to see.**

 **Anyways, enjoy the chapter.**

We run towards the train which is just about to leave.

We haul our big trunks and pets onto the train and the doors close. The train starts to move.

"Come on, let's find somewhere to sit, somewhere empty," says Lily and I follow her down the corridor.

We pass compartment after compartment, all of them filled with older students chatting and laughing.

We get to the end of the train to find a compartment with someone familiar in it.

"Severus!" Said Sirius Black coming up to us. "I knew I'd see you again soon. Still got your girlfriend I see, which is a surprise,"

The other boy in the compartment laughs and so does Lily. I, on the other hand, don't find it very amusing.

"Well Lily, let's move on," I say, wanting to leave Sirius and his friend.

"This is the last compartment, Severus," she says. "And I think these two are a better choice instead of the others. They're annoying, I know, but they can't be _that_ bad

Without waiting for anything from me she goes in with her trunk and sits down with her cat on her lap.

Sighing, I follow her in and sit down next to her.

"I'm James Potter," said the black, messy haired boy in glasses.

"Lily Evans," says Lily. "And this dark cloud here is Severus," she says, nudging me.

"Hi," I say, kind of unenthusiastically.

"Oh do cheer up," says Lily, "We're on the way to Hogwarts,"

I don't change my expression. To be honest, I don't want to be in the same compartment as Sirius for the whole journey.

"Well, what about we all say one thing about ourselves," says James. I can tell he is only saying this so he can say something stupid and sassy on his turn

"That's a good idea," says Lily. "I'm Lily Evans and I like reading, cooking, writing and drawing. I'm also as you lot would say, 'muggle-born'

Lily looked at me expectantly. It's my turn. "I'm Severus and... I like sport,"

That was rubbish and not even true. Luckily the others didn't say anything, but I know that they noticed.

"Well I'm Sirius and let's just say that all the ladies love a guy like me," he said with a grin at Lily. She rolled her eyes at him.

"I'm James Potter and I can predict the future,"

"No you can't," I say.

"Wait, guys, something is coming to me. I predict that you and I are going to get married someday," he says, winking at Lily

"In your dreams," Lily scoffs.

"And James isn't the only one with that dream," says Sirius, looking at me.

"Oh shut up," I say, feeling heat slowly start to rise in my cheeks.

"Well I'd rather marry Severus than you, James,"

I admit that I actually find this quite touching.

"Oh come on Lily, I must be more appealing than _Severus._ At least I'm more attractive," he says, running a hand through his hair making it even messier.

"Whether I find you appealing is none of your business. Come on Severus, we're moving," she said, standing up.

"Okay," I say, more than happy to oblige.

"Oh come on Lily, it was just a joke," says James, even though I know it isn't a joke.

Lily says nothing as we leave the compartment. After walking down the corridor we find we have no choice but to stay in there.

We go back in and sit down.

"Okay, I'll be reading so all of you had better shut up," says Lily, pulling a book out of her trunk. The title reads 'The Summer of the Swans'

"And if we don't?" Asks James.

"You don't want to know," she says.

I take out the envelope from my mother.

"Is that a letter from mummy, Sevy?" Asks Sirius, giving me another one of his grins.

"Oh and Sirius," says Lily, "Leave Severus alone, would you?"

"Anything you say, madam," says James, "Would you like anything, tea, biscuits?I will deliver it to you on a silver platter,"

Lily scowls but doesn't say anything to him.

Suddenly we hear something that sounds like a trolley being pushed.

"Anything from the trolley, dears?" Asks the lady, stopping in front of our compartment. Seeing all the food on the trolley is making me hungry. There is still some money in my envelope.

"I'll have some chocolate cauldrons," I say, handing her the money and taking the treat. I just realised how long it's been since I've tasted the simple delicacy of chocolate.

Lily looks up from her book and scans the trolley. "What are these?" She asks, pointing to a box.

"These are Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans," says the lady. "And by every flavour, they mean _every_ flavour,"

"Alright, I'll have some of those then," says Lily, pulling some leftover money from her pocket.

"Right, I'll have four chocolate frogs, some cauldron cakes, chocolate cauldrons and some pumpkin juice," says James, giving her a handful of galleons.

"You really going to eat _all_ of that?" asks Lily, looking at what he had bought.

"I'll be happy to share with you, love," he replied. She made a face at him.

"He's going to give me a bit," says Sirius.

"No way," he says wrapping protective arms around the food.

"Anyone want anything else?" She asks. We shake our heads so she leaves.

Lily puts her bookmark inside her book and opens the box of beans.

She takes out a red one and eats it. "Mmm, strawberry. And this one's caramel. These are really good,"

"Welcome to the world of wizard candy," says James who is barely understandable because he seems to have a bit of all of his food in his mouth at once.

I open up my chocolate cauldrons and take one out. As soon as I bite into it, the sweet, chocolaty flavour brings back memories, memories of my family.

While eating, I pull out the two pictures from the envelope. One of them is when we went to Dover castle and the other is when we went to a beach.

I look at the photos for a bit and then I put them away before I start to do anything embarrassing.

"Eww, vomit," says Lily with a disgusted face. James and Sirius laugh.

"Well, she did say _all_ the flavours," said Sirius, still laughing.

We sit around in our compartment, James and Sirius chat and Lily continues reading.

"Do any of you know how long this trip is?" Asks Lily suddenly.

"I think about three or four hours," says James.

"Well, I'm going to change into my Hogwarts robes," says Lily, taking them out of her trunk.

"Me too," I say, taking the excuse to leave this compartment.

We go to the bathrooms with our robes to change.

After five minutes we both come out of our respective bathrooms

"How do I look?" Asks Lily.

"Good," I reply. We go back to the compartment.

"Nice robes," says James to Lily. She ignores him.

We sit around for about half an hour until we approach something.

"Look, it's Hogwarts!" Lily points out the window and we all look.

We see the castle with its many turrets and towers. This castle is much bigger than any one I've seen before.

"Wow," I say, unable to contain my wonder.

"Good bye crappy public schools, hello Hogwarts," says James.

We drive for about five more minutes until we go into a village.

"I think that's Hogsmeade," says Sirius, "But I might be wrong,"

The train comes to a stop at the station and the doors open.

"Come on!" Says Lily.

We grab our trunks and go out one of the train doors.

"First years over here! First years!" Says a loud voice.

We go up to a tall man who seems to be calling for the first years. We stand by him until a large crowd forms around him.

"Alright, follow me, everyone," he says, leading us on.

"And by the way," he said, "Welcome to Hogwarts."

 **So that was that chapter, I'm sorry it took long but I am currently working on an important project, so I'm very busy.  
**

 **Well, that's it for now, if you have any suggestions or feedback, well, you know what to do.**

 **Over and out,**

 **Leila**


	11. Chapter 11 Sorted

**Hey everyone!**

 **So this will not be the very last chapter, I will at least have one or two more chapters, so don't worry.**

 **Anyways, enjoy the chapter**

We followed the tall man down a road in the dark, the light coming from his flaming torch and the houses.

We walked for about five minutes until we came to a lake and we went onto a pier.

"Alright, four on each boat, quickly everyone," he says.

Lily, James, Sirius and I get onto one of the boats.

There was a bit of fumbling around, but soon all of the first years were on boats.

He got into a boat and tapped the side with his long, slender wand. All the boats started moving and soon got into a triangular formation with him at the front, still holding his torch up high.

We soon came into view of Hogwarts again, its towers are less clear in the dark but impressive nonetheless.

"Welcome to Hogwarts!" He shouted over many _oohs_ and _aahs_.

We continue sailing for about five minutes more until we get to the end of it.

"Alright, follow me, everybody," he says and we follow him up the Hogwarts grounds.

"It all looks really cool at night," says Lily.

"It does," I reply.

We soon approach the huge doors to Hogwarts. They're the tallest doors I've ever seen.

"Welcome to Hogwarts, first years. My name is Professor Fickett. **(I'm awful at making up names, okay)** Follow me inside and you will be sorted into your houses."

We all follow professor Fickett inside. "Professor Thicket," says James. "Certainly looks like one,"

"That isn't even funny," says Lily, truthfully. "And also, it's Professor _Fickett_ ,"

Professor Fickett leads us inside a room which was right next to a giant hall.

"In a minute, we will all walk out of this room into the great hall. When I call your name, you will walk out and sit on the stool. I will place the hat on your head and it will sort you into your house. Then you will join your house's table and I will call out the next name. Is that clear?"

We all nod.

"Alright," he pushes open the doors and everyone claps as we walk out in front of the staff table. Professor Fickett pulls out his list.

"Lucius Malfoy," calls out professor Fickett. A boy with sleek, light blonde hair and grey eyes walks up and sits on the stool. If he's nervous, he doesn't show it. Professor Fickett places the hat on his head.

"Slytherin!" Shouts, the old wrinkled hat. The occupants of the table decorated in silver and green all clap. Lucius goes and sits with them.

"Arthur Weasley," he says. This time, a boy with red hair walks up nervously and sits down.

"Gryffindor!" Said the hat after a moment's hesitation. The Gryffindor table claps.

"Peter Pettigrew," A nervous, small boy scampered up to the stool. Professor Fickett placed the hat onto his head.

"Hmmm..." said the hat. Peter looked even more nervous.

The hat continued to think, sometimes saying _hmm_ , or _very interesting._

After about two minutes, people at the tables began to murmur. It probably usually doesn't take this long.

"What's going on?" Whispered Lily, "It's been three minutes!"

After about two minutes, the hat shouted "Gryffindor!"

The Gryffindor table clapped for the still shaking Peter came to the table.

"Bellatrix Lestrange," called out the professor. Bellatrix swaggered onto the stage, showing no signs of nervousness.

"Slytherin!" Shouted the hat just as it touched her head.

After that, we had Narcissa Black sorted into Slytherin, Remus Lupin into Gryffindor and Alyssa Jenkins sorted into Ravenclaw.

"Sirius Black."

Grinning, Sirius went up onto the stage and the hat was put on his head. "Gryffindor!" It shouted and he went to the applauding Gryffindor table.

"Lily Evans," said the professor.

Lily walks up with confidence and sits down on the stool.

"Hmm," says the hat. Will we have a repeat of what happened to Peter?

"It's almost as if- wow, very interesting," says the hat, more talking to itself than us. Nobody says anything.

The hat is silent for about a minute. "Gryffindor!" It suddenly shouts and Lily goes down to join the Gryffindor table.

Amos Diggory was next sorted into Hufflepuff.

"Severus Snape," calls out Professor Fickett. I go out with none of the same confidence that Lily had. I sit down and Fickett places the hat on my head.

 _So, what do we have here?_ Asked the hat, somehow communicating to me in my mind. I don't really know what to say.

"Well, I suppose he's a Slytherin!" Says the hat out loud.

No. No. No.

Lily and I are in different houses.

 **Line break for no reason, this is a good time to get a snack, drink, do that homework you've been putting off (who am I kidding, why would anyone go and do their homework now- I wouldn't)**

The Slytherin table claps and a go and sit down on the bench. The Gryffindor table is all the way across the table. I try and spot Lily but I don't see her.

Others are being sorted, but I don't pay attention. I had thought that Lily and I would be in the same house. We would do everything together, but the house separation will separate us, I know it.

"James Potter," said Professor Fickett. James is the last student and everyone is very hungry.

James swaggers up to the stool and gets sorted into Gryffindor.

The headmaster stands up from the staff table and goes up to a podium decorated with candles and an owl.

"Welcome, first years, and welcome back to everyone else. Here we are, beginning yet another year which I'm sure will be a great one. As usual, we have our same rules, stay out of the forbidden forest and all the others which I'm sure you all know. Anyway, it is now time for us to satisfy our rumbling stomachs. You may eat!"

He flicks his wand and much to everyone's delight, the tables fill themselves with wonderful foods, vegetables, near, fish and bread.

"I'm Bellatrix," says Bellatrix, coming and sitting in the empty spot next to me.

"Severus, a pleasure to meet you," I say, already secretly loathing her.

We talk for a bit, but I just can't wait for her to leave. I want to talk to Lily.

"Um-excuse me for a minute," I say, getting up and leaving.

I go to the Gryffindor table and locate Lily who is talking to Molly who we had met this morning.

"Hello, Severus," she says.

"I thought we'd be in the same house," I blurt out. "I hoped,"

She reaches out and touches my arm. "Me too, Severus. But sometimes, that's the way things turn out. We obviously have different personalities, and they're so different that the hat separated us. The hat doesn't make mistakes."

 _The hat doesn't make mistakes._ I personally think that she's wrong. I think that the hat put one of us in the wrong house.

"Oh well, Lily. Looks like you'll have to find a new boyfriend," says James from across the table.

"And I know someone that I know you'll like. His name is James Potter," says Sirius. "I can hook you guys up,"

"Oh do stop it, boys," says Lily. "And Severus- you're getting some funny looks from your table."

I turn around and sure enough, there are some people looking at me and muttering. I don't care.

"Well see you tomorrow, Severus."

"Yes. Bye," I say and go back to my table.

"You know," says Bellatrix when I get back, "My sis told me not to associate with those Gryffindors, they're so annoying,"

I ignore her and focus on my jacket potato.

"No seriously, you might like her now, but trust me, in a few years, you two will grow apart. You will be separated,"

Even though I try and ignore Bellatrix's words, they still have an impact. _Maybe she's right. Maybe we will separate._

 _I will not let that happen_ I promise to myself. I will not.

 **So that was that chapter, I know this is going really slowly, but I actually prefer writing like that, writing lots of details on most things.**

 **Anyway, that's it, you know the drill, if you have any suggestions or feedback, be sure to leave a review.**

 **Bye for now,**

 **Leila**


	12. Chapter 12 Bellatrix and Lucius

**Hey everyone!**

I know it's been absolutely ages, the next one will come soon, I promise.

Anyways, as always, enjoy the chapter.

I lie in my four poster bed in the Slytherin bedroom in the dungeons. The sheets are silky soft and the bed is extremely comfortable.

Lily is all I can think about. I can only think about how she's in the same house with James Potter and Sirius. They will change her in some way or another, I know it.

I turn to lie on my side. Somewhere in the distance, I hear a clock chime. Twelve chimes. Midnight.

I didn't realise it was this late. I had barely been thinking as we walked down to the dungeon which is the Slytherin house. The prefect, a tall, blonde haired girl called Felicia had led us here and had told us the password, which is Severtratius.

I expected I'd be in the same house as Lily, I would fall asleep in the same room as James and Sirius, and of course that would be a con, but at least I'd be in the same house as Lily. At least I'd be content.

I just lie there, listening to Lucius Malfoy snore very loudly. If I was in Gryffindor, I would probably be listening to James snore. Or chat with Sirius.

I hear a sigh coming from the bed across my bed.

"At least I'm not the only one awake," says the person.

"I suppose not," I say.

"You're Severus, right?"

"Yes," I say, deciding not to lie.

"My name is Luka Jenkins. I am in big trouble,"

"Why?"

"My sister was sorted into Ravenclaw, just like my whole family. I think that they'll abandon me. I know that they're not proud,"

"I'm sure that they are," I say.

Luka sighs. "We'll see. I just know that my parents won't be happy and I don't belong here."

I can relate, except that I know that my parents won't care if I tell them. I probably won't even bother.

I hear a snore, and I realize that Luka is asleep.

Soon, my exhaustion takes over I drift off into a dreamless sleep as well.

I wake up, still feeling tired. I hear lots of talking and walking around.

"Oh look, Sev's awake," says a voice that I recognise to be Luka's.

"Get up quickly, classes start at eight. It's now quarter past seven," says someone.

I decide to get out of bed. There are seven boys in total, including me.

I go over to my trunk and pull out my Hogwarts robes which I change into.

"Does anyone know when we'll get our schedules? And also, who's the head of the house?" I ask.

"We'll get them at breakfast," says a boy with black, messy hair, not entirely unlike Sirius'. "And our head of house is called Professor Slughorn, he's also the potions teacher. I'm Regulus Black, by the way," **(I know that probably isn't right but as you know, I'm awful at making up names, lol. And I know that Regulus is younger than Sirius, I did that for the same reason as before).**

"Severus Snape," I say. I grab my wand and put it in my pocket. "I'm going down to breakfast," I say.

"I'll come with you," says Regulus, also ready. We go up a flight of stairs.

"Do you know where to go now?" Asks Regulus. I shake my head.

"Dam, first day and we're already lost," he says.

"I just seem to remember that the Great Hall is on the ground floor," I say.

"Well we've exited the dungeons, the air at least smells normally," he says.

We decide to walk straight ahead, and then we take a left turn.

"Boys, are you lost?" Says a voice. It's Professor Fickett.

"Yes. We're looking for the great hall," Says Regulus.

"Follow me," he says, and we do that. After a few minutes, we're in the great hall.

We go and sit down at our table which already has some people on it.

"Wow, this looks delicious," says Regulus, filling up his plate with bacon, sausages and eggs.

I take some eggs and toast with some baked tomatoes and mushrooms.

"Haggg u ewer chied shumpking jush?" Asks Regulus with his mouth full.

"What?"

He swallows his mouthful. "Have you ever tried pumpkin juice?"

"No,"

He reaches out for a pitcher of juice that looks like orange juice. "Try some, it's delicious," he says, pouring me and himself a glass.

I take a sip. It tastes almost, entirely, unlike orange juice. I can't decide whether I like it or not.

"Ummm..."

"It's one of those tastes you have to get used to," he says, draining his glass.

"Attention, everyone," says the headmaster. "I hope everyone made it here all right. Everyone will receive their timetables and then go off to the common rooms to get the things you need for your first class. The way it works is you have ten minutes between lessons to go and get the things you need and go to the loo if necessary. Remember, the forbidden forest is always out of bounds. Enjoy your day," he says, sitting back down.

Soon, a man comes up to us with a big belly and tufty brown hair. "I'm Horace Slughorn, your head of house. Here are your timetables," he says, handing us a piece of parchment. "There will also be one hanging up on the house notice board in the common room."

Once he leaves, we look at our schedules.

"We have Charms and then Potions first and second," says Regulus.

"After a twenty minute break we have Transfiguration and then double Defence Against the Dark Arts. We have fifty minutes of lunch and then History of Magic and lastly Herbology,"

"Can't wait for Defence against the Dark Arts," says Regulus.

"Same," I say.

Someone taps me on the shoulder. I turn around to see who it is. It's Lily.

"Hi Lily," I say. "This is Regulus by the way,"

"Hi Regulus. Anyways, how was your sleep?"

"Not bad. You?"

"Okay. I can't wait to start Charms. I just can't wait to start learning magic,"

"Me too. This is where we belong, not in those muggle schools,"

"Severus, why are you talking to her!" Says Bellatrix from across the table.

"Zip it Bellatrix," says Lily.

"Go back where you belong you mudblood,"

The whole table fell silent.

"Don't call her that _Lestrange_ ," I say.

"Mudblood, mudblood, she's a filthy mudblood," sings Bellatrix. Narcissa, who was sitting next to her.

"You don't belong here, you're not a proper wizard, you're one of them, a mudblood who doesn't even deserve to set foot in these halls,"

"You know Bellatrix, it's funny how much you like to talk about things you don't understand," says Lily, her facial expression practically unreadable.

"What's going on here?" Asks Slughorn.

"Severus here is talking to a _mudblood_ ," says Bellatrix. "Who doesn't deserve to be here. Just wait until my parents hear that this school has mudbloods in it."

"Bellatrix, please don't call her a mudblood, Lily here has all the right to be in this school as you do,"

Bellatrix glared at Lily who glared back at her.

"Classes start in five minutes, I suggest you all go and get your Charms books and head to class," says Slughorn.

"See you in charms," I say to Lily and I head off to get my book.

 **That's it for now, I will make an effort to upload chapters every Saturdayish, so if I can't make Saturday I'll just fall back on the ish bit.**

 **Also, I made a couple book references in this chapter, did you spot them?**

 **Until next time,**

 **Leila**


	13. Chapter 13 First Day, First Classes

**Hey Guys!**

 **Here** **is the next entry,** **I'm so sorry I took ages, I've just had a lot on my plate recently, tests, concerts and of course the upcoming Battle of the Bands where I am. Anyway, enjoy, and I'll try to write a bit quicker, but I can't make any promises**

We go back to the Slytherin house to get our books.

"Severus, why were you talking to that mudblood?" Asks Bellatrix.

"Go to hell, Bellatrix," I say.

"That's pretty rude," says Lucius Malfoy, who's standing next to her.

"Well, she isn't exactly being polite when she calls Lily a mudblood," says Regulus.

"Well, at least I know better than to speak to the mudbloods," she says.

"You know Severus, I think you're better than that. You look like you are a good person," says Lucius. He holds out his hand. "Do you want to be friends?"

I don't take it. "I think I'm capable of finding better friends than you, people who don't have a problem with me talking to Lily,"

"Come on, we'll be late to class," says Regulus, tugging on my sleeve. We go to charms, leaving Lucius and Bellatrix.

"It's my first day here and I already hate people," I say.

"Do you know where charms is?" Asks Regulus.

"I think it's on the fifth floor, that's what the timetable says,"

"Well, let's go, I really don't want to be late on the first day,"

We climb up the stairs all the way to the fifth floor.

"Maybe they should consider installing some lifts in this place," says Regulus between pants.

We walk into the room with _Charms_ written above the door in swirly letters.

"Boys, you're late. Sit down quickly," says the professor. We take a seat in the back of the class next to Luka.

"My name is professor Hienlebenik but just call me professor Daniel. I am your charms teacher. In this class you will learn charms, which are small, useful spells which you will probably use lots in your future lives. Today we shall begin by finding out who we are. When it's your turn, I want you to say your name and your house. You can start," he says, pointing to someone in the front row.

"Alyssa Jenkins, Ravenclaw,"

"Lily Evans, Gryffindor,"

And we continued around the room. "What took you guys so long?" Whispered Luka.

"Bellatrix just _had_ to demonstrate how annoying she is," I say.

Suddenly, the whole room went silent. People started looking in my direction.

"Dude, it's your turn," says Regulus. Some people start to snigger.

"Severus Snape, Slytherin," I say quickly.

"Severus, please pay attention, or I will have to assign seats," says professor Daniel.

"Luka Jenkins, Slytherin," says Luka.

"Dude, it's only the first class and you've already embarrassed yourself," says Regulus.

"I don't care what the others think," I say.

"Alright class, now that we know each other, it's time to start your first assignment. We will learn the simple moving spell. You will each get a feather and the spell is _legemitis movitis._ When you say this, you flick your wand slightly to the left. Don't expect to be able to do it perfectly the first time, it takes practice and patience. "

The professor flicked his wand and suddenly a white feather appeared on each of our desks.

"Cool," says Regulus.

Soon, the room was filled with the sounds of legemitis movitis, and groans from the people who can't do it.

"Legemitis movitis," says Regulus. Nothing happens. "Damn it, that's like my tenth time,'

"You just need to be patient and calm," says Luka. He points his wand at the feather. "Legemitis movitis," he says with a light flick of the wrist. Almost immediately, the feather moves a tiny bit to the left.

"Well done," I say. I try it, with no luck.

"Class, silence for a moment please, put down your wands quickly. Who has managed to make their feather move?"

Luka, Alyssa, Lily put their hands up.

"Well done you three. Since class is about to end, the homework I am giving you is to try and make your feather move by our next class which is on Wednesday. It might take a little practice, but you will manage it. You are dismissed."

The class empties and I go up to Lily.

"Hi Lily. Well done at mastering the charm, I can't do it,"

"Thanks, I know you'll get it soon. Once we get it, we can start to move bigger things, I'm sure it will be very useful."

"Yeah. What do we have next?"

"Potions, and I think that's down in the dungeons,"

"So maybe in the direction of the Slytherin house," I say.

"Maybe," I say. We go down the stairs in the direction of the Slytherin house.

"Oh look, there it is," I say, pointing to a room at the end of the corridor with _Potions_ written above the door.

We enter the room and stand around a table with one small cauldron sits.

"Welcome class," said the professor, once everyone had arrived. "My name is professor Slughorn and I am your potions teacher. In this class, we will obviously be making potions. What kind of potions? All kinds, from healing potions to love potions-"

As he says love potions some of the girls say "Oohhhh." He laughs.

"It will be a while until we get to those, but I don't think that you girls need them anyway. Any questions?"

Lily puts her hand up. "What will we start with, professor?"

"What is your name, dear?"

"Lily Evans,"

"Well miss Evans, we shall be starting with a very simple potion, the hiccoughing potion. You will find the recipe on page four of your textbook. You should have all the necessary ingredients. You may begin!"

We each go to a desk and start to set out our cauldrons. I end up on the same table as Lily and a girl with bright red hair.

"This is Molly, Severus," she says, introducing her. She nods at me and we get to work.

"Remember, don't put the heat below your cauldrons _too_ high, you want it very low," says the professor.

"Two hundred grams of chopped black beetle eyes and one hundred and twenty five of diced lion fish spleen- sounds simple enough," says Lily.

We start to chop up our ingredients and weighing them.

I throw in my black beetle eyes and stir them as the book instructs.

Next, I add in the lion fish spleens and the mixture turns a murky green colour -as the book says it should be.

"Alright class, the lesson is almost over, I want you to put some of your potion into a vial with your name on it and bring it here.

I bottle up some of my potion and bring it up. Professor Slughorn beams at me.

"That looks to be the perfect colour, Mr..."

"Severus, Severus Snape, sir," I say.

"Yes, it looks to me like you've done a smashing job- unlike some others I see,"

The professor is right, I cab see some Hufflepuff girls clutching vials with brownish and some with even blueish potions inside of them.

"Thank you, sir,"

"You're very welcome. Now class, you are dismissed,"

 **So I know I took a little longer than I said, but you know, if you're looking for someone who uploads very frequently, I'm not your kind of person.**

 **See you next time,**

 **Leila**


	14. Chapter 14 Fascinating

**Hey there my wonderful fans!**

 **Oh my gosh you guys,** **25 reviews! I want to thank everyone who decided to leave a review, you guys are amazing, I love you guys. Okay, I'm going to stop this and actually give you the chapter. Please enjoy.**

"So, what shall we do for break?" I ask Lily.

"I was thinking about checking out the library, they probably have some good books in there,"

"I'll come with you. Do you know where it is?"

"No. I guess we'll have to find out,"

We see some passing sixth years.

"Excuse me," says Lily, "Do you kmnow where the library is,"

"Down the hall, first left. It is easy to find," says one of them.

We follow their instructions and we get to the library. We enter it.

"Wow," says Lily as we scan the shelves. "I bet there are some _amazing_ books in here. I wonder if they have novels or just, you know, magic books,"

"We can always ask the librarian," I say. We go up to the desk where the librarian is flipping through a large novel, sipping almost grey colored tea from a mug. On the desk, a card reads _Madam Pince._

"Excuse me madam Pince," says Lily, "Does this library include any, um, muggle novels?"

Madam Pince looks at us through her beady eyes. Even though she isn't sitting that much higher than us, she still seems to tower over us.

"This library has no place for muggle novels, but you can find a marvelous collection of our novels, which personally I find to be preferable,"

"Thank you madam," says Lily and we walk away.

"I already despise that woman," we both say at the exact same time. We both laugh.

Suddenly, we run into James and Sirius and James who come around the corner, laughing.

"Hi Lily," says James, running a hand through his messy hair, whether to make it neater or messier I don't know.

"Waddup, Sev?" Says Sirius.

"Hi guys. How did you enjoy the first classes?" Asks Lily.

"Charms was a bit of a bore to be honest. Moving stupid feathers, seriously, I want to do something _exciting_ ," Said Sirius.

"Says the person who's feather didn't budge," Lily says. "Anyway, it's only the very first class. I'm surprised we've started with that and not something much simpler,"

"What are you doing for your break?" Asks James.

"Going somewhere away from _you_ ," I say.

"Woah woah woah Sev, no need to get all protective all of a sudden. We were just wondering," says Sirius.

"Let's leave Lily and her boyfriend alone," says James.

"He's not my-"

"Catch you later," they say and walk away.

"I get more annoyed with them the more I see them," says Lily.

"I know how you feel," I say.

"Let's go to the great hall. We might even see some of our friends there,"

We manage to find our way to the Great Hall which the tables have some students sitting at. We find some Ravenclaw girls from our year doing the Charms homework.

"Hi, I'm Lily. Can I sit with you?"

"Of course. I'm Becca. Could you get your feather to move in class?"

"A bit, but I need to practice more,"

They all launch into conversation. Reluctantly, I move away from the group and look around the hall.

Luka sees me and beckons me over. I sit down next to him.

"Hi, what are you doing?"

"Writing a letter to my mum. She told me to write to her today, so I'm doing so,"

"Do you have an owl?"

"Yes. Didn't you see her in the common room?"

"Oh yeah, I remember. Wish I had an owl,"

"Hey, if you ever need to send something to your parents, feel free to use Tawny,"

"Thanks man," I say, knowing I probably wouldn't want to send anything to my parents.

Suddenly, we hear the ringing of a bell.

"That probably signals the next class," says Luka

"What do we have now?"

"History of magic,"

"That can' t be _so_ bad, can it?"

I was wrong. Professor Binns was one of the many ghosts of Hogwarts, and was probably the most boring. His classroom seemed to have an air of boringness in and around it.

We sit in the back, not listening to the Professor droning on about Troll breeding or whatever it is. If I look around, I can see people having whispered conversations, staring into space or just dozing. The only people concentrating are Lily and her new Ravenclaw friends who are taking notes.

"What is the _point_ of this stupid class anyway," says Luka, his eyes staring up at the dusty ceiling.

"To discourage us from becoming magic historians maybe?"

"Well, they're definitely succeeding," says Luka, yawning.

"Alright class, your homework is to read pages seven to ten in your textbook and answer one to ten on page nine," says Professor Binns, speaking with a voice that easily could and does put you to sleep. "You are dismissed. Enjoy your next classes,"

We pack away and leave the room. Lily comes up to me.

"A very interesting class in my opinion. The development of troll breeding is really fascinating, don't you agree?"

"Um, yeah, fascinating. Do you know what we have now?"

"Herbology in greenhouse one," replies Lily.

"Yay,"

 **Okay, I know, short chapter, but I just want to end this one here. Next one should be coming soon!"**

 **Leila**


	15. Chapter 15 Memories

***Peeks out from behind a curtain and gingerly walks out* Hi everyone, I'm back. Heads turn. A moment of silence, and then an apple is flung in my direction. I dodge as various rotten vegetables and bits of furniture are thrown in my direction. So this is one of the last few chapters of this story. I am very sorry it has been ages. Please enjoy this chapter.**

And so life went on. Day after day, class after class. I enjoy it, I suppose, as I don't have to worry about my parents arguing. I can wake up and know I'll have three good meals a day. I can wake up and know I'll have people to talk to, things to distract me from, well, myself, I guess.

It is Christmas. Twelve Christmas trees line the walls of the great hall and all Hogwarts seems to be merrier in general. Unfortunately, that doesn't match my mood too much. I walk along the corridor after our last class, passing small groups of students laughing and discussing their holiday plans. Lily joins me.

"Any plans for Christmas?" She asks. I shake my head. I have no desire to go home. Well, a little bit I suppose. I haven't gotten any letters or anything from them. To be fair I haven't sent any. It is almost as if I fear my home as if I don't want anything to do with it. "Are you going home?" I ask.

"Yes," she says excitedly. "I can't wait to see mum and dad and Tuney. Oh, I hope she forgives me,"

"But you do realise that it's not your fault that she's not magic? If anyone's it's hers," The words slipped from my mouth before I could stop them.

"It is no one's fault," she says, all the kindness and warmth went from her voice. "Anyway, the train is leaving soon, I have to pack." She walks away without any sort of goodbye. I walk off feeling glum. Why, why, why can't I control myself. Why did I have to let my tongue slip?

I get to the library and enter. The smell of books hits me like a slap in the face. There is no particular reason for why I'm here, I just want something to do. I look through the shelves, remembering the first day when Lily asked if they have any muggle books. That was a good day.

Christmas day

I wake up on Christmas morning. No one else is in my dorm room. All are at home with their families, probably opening presents and looking forward to a delicious Christmas dinner. I don't expect any presents, but I still check. To my immense surprise, I find one at the foot of my bed. I pick it up and read the tag.

I hope you like it R.A.B

I manage a small smile. Regulus' signature. I make a mental note to get him a gift when he returns. I unwrap it. It is a book titled "Everything and More for the Amateur Brewer". I am almost in tears. I hardly ever got presents, and this is the best one ever. I open it and read through it, studying the diagrams and tips it gives. I read it for a while and get out of bed. I wander through the corridors not encountering anyone. It is rather early, and it seems like most people go home during the holidays.

I have an idea. I run back to the dorm room and grab some parchment, quill and ink. I sit down at the desk and start to write.

Dear Regulus

Wishing you and your family a happy Christmas. I love the present, thanks a lot. How is your holiday? It's quite strange here at Hogwarts. The dormitory is so lonely and there is hardly anyone around.

Can't wait until you get back, Severus.

I know it's short but I am no good at writing these sentimental letters. I fold it up and wrap a small piece of string around it as I don't have any envelope or ribbon.

I run up to the Owelry. Most of the owls are there. I do like it up here. It is quiet except for the occasional hoots and ruffling of feathers. The view from this tower is stunning. It is very beautiful up here, even though it is rather drafty and the floor is covered in owl droppings. I call down a light grey owl and attach the letter to his leg.

"Take this to Regulus Black, please," I say. I hold out my arm. After a few moments, the owl flies off. I watch it fly until it is a small speck in the sky.

End of the Second year

"So Severus, do you know what you're choosing?" Lily asks me. We are sitting in the library one evening, just one week before the summer holidays start.

"Choosing?" I ask.

"Our elective subjects of course. Has your head of house not told you? We have to choose at least two elective subjects. Either Arithmancy, divination, care of magical creatures or muggle studies,"

"Um, what are the first two?" Ok, yes, I know I am not being very impressive, but I couldn't help myself.

"Arithmancy is basically Wizard Maths. It is a type of magic that looks at the magical properties of numbers, in a nutshell. Divination is predicting the future, basically. I am so sad that we can only choose up to three, I wish I could do all four,"

"Even muggle studies? But you know all that already!"

"Yes, but it would be interesting learning about it from a wizard's perspective. Any idea which ones you'll do?"

"Um, maybe, uh, care of magical creatures? That sounds quite fun," I say.

"Yes, it does. Oh, I'm so excited! And we get to go to Hogsmeade as well!"

"Oh yeah, Hogsmeade," I say. They gave us a permission slip for our parents to sign. I suppose my dad can sign it if he's around.

We sit in silence for a while. "Have you got any plans for the holidays?" I ask.

"Well, we might go to Paris, it all depends on my dad's work. We can still meet at the park though, but I'll have to get away from Petunia if she'll talk to me. I've sent her five letters this month, she hasn't replied to any!"

"Well, um, I don't really know what to say. Sorry, I guess. But you have to remember, it is not your fault that she is not magical. She could come here but it would be worse for her, as Dumbledore said. She probably just wasn't able to get the owl to send it or something,"

She looks at me sadly. "Oh god, is that the time? I promised I'd meet with my friends. Gotta go. See you during the summer, soon, I promise." She picks up her stuff and I wave her bye.

Fourth year, November

It is the middle of November, the middle of the night. I can't sleep so I am taking a walk around the grounds. Yes, I know it is not allowed. Yes, I know I could get in big trouble. Yes, I don't care.

I walk past a humongous tree in the middle of the grounds called the Whomping Willow, not too far from the lake. It was put there in my first year, and no one really knows why. It doesn't exactly make the best decoration.

My mind is wandering. No, no, don't think about her. No, don't. Great, you're thinking about her.

Lily.

She is so beautiful, and she has only gotten prettier since I first met her. Her beautiful green eyes which can captivate anyone in the same room as her. Her red hair that outlines her perfectly shaped face. Her smile. Her laugh. the small skip in her step when we walk to a class she loves. All that and so much more.

I love her. I can't deny it. How could one not? But I am sure she doesn't like me. Why would anyone ever? I'm unattractive, moody, inconsistent, selfish and very deep inside the friend zone.

What am I going to do about it? Well, next year there is going to be a sort of ball at Christmas. The Yule Ball. I am going to ask Lily to the ball. I am going to build up my confidence and do it. Will she be able to say no? Maybe. She might. But I am going to get with her if it's the last thing I do.

Suddenly, I hear scuffling, coming from somewhere behind me. I hide behind a bush and peer over. I don't see anything but I can still hear rustling and something moving. It is probably some animal but I don't move. I try and breathe as quietly as I can.

The noise is getting louder and I can hear a voice, but I don't recognise it. I think it is a woman speaking but I can't make out any words. I also hear another sound, a low sort of moaning, as if someone's in pain. I stay in my place.

The sounds move closer, and I can see two figures, one quite a short but wide one, and the other one leaner.

"Come on now, it will be alright, it will be alright," says the woman. Suddenly, I realise who it is, it's Professor Sprout.

She checks a pocket watch and jumps a little. "Come on, we don't have much time, you can make it, you can, you can!" She says, a little louder than before. The moaning is louder and some of the moans turn into small screams. I still have no clue about what they're doing and who is the one in pain.

The soon make it to the closest point that they can get to the Whomping Willow. The monstrous tree sways its branches. She pulls out her wand and mutters an incantation. I don't know how, but suddenly, the tree is still. The other person with her starts to scream, but they are muffled as she puts a muffliato charm behind her. I can tell that whoever it is is in a lot of pain.

Suddenly, they disappear. It had happened in a blink. Where are they? Did they apparate somewhere?

I wait five minutes. The grounds are quiet other than the rustles coming from the forbidden forest trees. I decide that now is my time to escape and that I can't stay here all night. I leave my hiding place and run back to the dorm as fast as I can.

Fifth year, four days before the Yule Ball

Today is the day. Not just a normal day. Today is the day. The day I am going to ask Lily to the ball. I have everything ready. A speech that I have been writing and memorizing for weeks now. Some fancy clothing that I found in my father's wardrobe. So far she hasn't mentioned going with anyone. She is mine.

Potions class is over and now it's time for lunch. Lily stays back to talk to the teacher, so I hang around, pretending to organise my ingredients while I wait for her.

Two eternities later, she has finished talking and the teacher leaves. I take a deep breath and go up to her. Ok. This is it. Don't do anything stupid. This is your one and only chance.

"Um, hi Lily. Um, we, well, I was, uh, was wondering if, if, if, you'd like to, to go the Yule Ball with me?" I stutter out.

I study her face. She looks a little sullen, almost sorrowful. She breaks eye contact and shuffles her feet a little.

"Um, well, Severus, um, I'm really sorry, but, I'm going with someone else. I'm very sorry,"

No. No. No no no no. This can't be happening to me. Who? Since when? Why? I don't even want to know. I just want to curl up in my dorm and wither away.

"Oh, ok," is all I say.

"But you'll still come, right?" She asks, sounding hopeful.

What's the point? You've got no one to go with anyway.

"Um, I'll see,"

"Ok. See you in double defence against the dark arts," she says and walks out.

Great. Stupid stupid stupid me. I must have done something wrong . Why would she go with me? She's just making it up so I don't feel bad.

I don't feel like eating. Instead, I go back to the Slytherin fourth year dorm. I sit on my bed, but no tears come. I sit and stare at the wall until some other people enter and I remember I have to get my Defence Against the Dark Arts books. I take them and follow the other two Slytherins.

I trudge to class and I purposely sit as far away from Lily as possible to avoid eye contact. Usually, I'm not like this, but I am not sure if I can handle talking to her right now, I might burst into tears. The lesson goes by, we learn some stuff about unforgivable curses and get a ton of homework. Again, to avoid Lily, I stay behind to talk to the teacher to make sure I can get back to the dorm without passing her.

I make it and crawl under the covers of my bed. I close the curtains around it. I don't care if people see and what they think. But you're still coming to the Ball, right?

Should I?

 **Author's note: I know this is a pretty long chapter, the next one will be out really soon (sometime today) as I have almost finished writing it. Unfortunately, this is the second to last chapter of this story :( Maybe I could make a sequel? Leave a review if you want a sequel, which would probably be set during the time of the Harry Potter series. Thank you so much for reading and don't forget to Rate and Review!**


	16. Chapter 16 The Yule Ball (Part 1)

Night of the Yule Ball 

"Dude, you'll be fine, I mean you look, um, you look..."

"I look what? I don't even know why I'm doing this Regulus, I don't have a date, there's really no point in-"

"Listen Sev, Reg and I have a plan," says Luka, untying his tie for the 5th time.

"Can't you just do that by hand?" Regulus asks him.

"I can't, and anyway, it's here in the book," Luka points at a page in his charms book with his wand. "I know the theory of the spell, and it's really easy," he jabs at the instructions with the wand. "I just can't get it right,"

"Look, I'll try," I say. I pick up my wand and the book. I mutter the incantation and with the correct hand motion, the tie almost instantly ties itself.

"It's a little tight but wow, not bad Sev. Maybe you'll become a professor here one day," says Luka, fidgeting with the knot.

"Doubt it," I mutter.

"Professor Snape, Professor Severus Snape...has a nice ring to it," says Regulus. "What would you teach?"

"Probably defence against the dark arts...reparo!" I point my wand at my ripped robes and they improve a are still way too baggy for me though.

"Hurry up you two, the ball started like 10 minutes ago!" Says Regulus.

"Any particular reason why you want to be so punctual? Got a date Regulus?" I ask him.

"Nooooooooooooooo, I just want to be punctual for the big plan!" I roll my eyes.

"Oh, of course, the plan! But Reg, we gotta wait a bit, it can't happen now," says Luka.

"When are you guys gonna tell me what this plan is? I know it's about me," I say.

"All in good time Sev. Now, you all ready?"

I take one last look at myself in the mirror. My hair, as usual, is a mess and my robes hang off my thin frame. I guess I don't look too bad, and anyway, I don't even have a date so it doesn't matter. "I am, I guess. I'm only doing this because you guys are," I remind them.

"Yes yes yes, and to see Lily in her dress of course," says Regulus.

"I'm not- she has a date anyway," I say, although I can feel my cheeks getting a little hot.

"Yeah but doesn't mean we won't be able to look at her. Come on, let's go,"

As they leave, I take a look at the Slytherin dorm as if it will be my last. Honestly I'd much rather be in a dark corner somewhere practicing spells or reading but I won't tell Regulus and Luka that.

We make our way to the Great Hall. The halls are crowded and there seems to be a bit of a queue to get into the Great Hall which we join the end of. I try and spot Lily's vibrant red hair in the mass of students but I can't see her. Unfortunately, I see James and his gang a bit in front of us in the queue, laughing. I make a mental note to stay as far away from them tonight as I can.

Eventually, we get inside the Hall. The tables have all disappeared except for one which is covered in food and drinks. At the front, there is a large stage where a band is playing. In the middle, there is the large dance floor with many people dancing. "Why are we even here?" I ask for what seems to be the hundredth time tonight. "You'll see. Now, Reg and I will go get some drinks. You wait here, and keep an eye on the entrances." Luka says to me.

They start to make a beeline towards the table. I lean back against a pillar and scan the hall. I recognise most people, there are even some teachers there. I spot James' and his gang again, chatting and laughing at the side of the dance floor. I notice that it is only Sirius, Peter and Remus. Could James have a date? And who would it be? Do the others have dates? Thankfully, my train of thought is interrupted by-

"Shots! We got shots! Drink up!" Luka and Regulus come back holding three shots of firewhiskey each. I get the feeling they've already had a couple though, as their grins have doubled from when they were here before. They hand me one of the glasses full of the golden firey liquid.

We clink them together and then take them down all at the same time. The second that the liquid gold hits my throat, it starts to burn. I drop the glass and clutch my throat from the pain.

"You get used to it Sev, don't worry, you're not dying," says Regulus, hitting my back. "After a couple more you won't feel anything anymore!" Suspicions confirmed.

"How can I die when I'm already dead?" I mumble to myself, standing up. The burning has gotten a little better, but I can still feel it. "Hey, have any of you seen James?" I ask them. "And do you know if he has a date?"

They look at each other. It is clear they know something I don't.

"He has a date," Regulus says, sounding sombre. "And? Who is it?" I demand. "Why do you care so much? It's just stupid James Potter," injects Luka. "Who cares if he's got a date anyway?"

"So what if I care? Does it bother you that much?" I fire back, although he does have a point. Why do I care so much?

"Hey Regulus, snap out of it," says Luka, shaking Regulus' arm. He seems to be staring into space.

Silently he points towards the dance floor. "Severus, you might not want to see this," he says, very softly. I look at the point that he's pointing at. Suddenly, I feel the world crashing down around me.


	17. Chapter 17 The Yule Ball (part 2)

The Yule Ball

Regulus is pointing to James and his date, dancing on the dance floor. Their steps are in sync as he twirls her around. They are almost one as they dance so perfectly together, as if they and only they exist. He is smiling and seems to have eye contact with his partner.

I can't see her face but I immediately recognise who she is.

Her dress is a stunning dark blue colour. The bodice has lines of sequins on it and the skirt is ankle length and flowy. It flows around her as she twirls in a way that brings back memories. Her long, red hair flows down her right shoulder and magically doesn't become messy as she moves.

Because this is Lily Evans, she would never let such a thing happen.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing?" Regulus and Luka drag me away and out of my trance. We stand in the corner of the room furthest from the stage.

"You can't just stare at her like that! What if she or James sees? What on earth were you thinking?" Luka screams at me.

I grab the firewhiskey that somehow he hasn't drunk yet and take it down. Ignoring the burn, I take mine and down that as well. The burning intensifies but I don't care. I reach for Regulus's but he drinks it quickly.

"No more for you Sev, you'll just end up being sick,"

"You're one to talk," I mumble through burning lips. "Anyway, being sick is favourable to emotion."

"Oh stop that," Luka says. Regulus and I have to go put our plan into action quite soon."

"Is it something to do with James and Lily? If it is, I want you to leave them alone. If you try and interfere with them, even if you're trying to help me, it will only make it worse, really," I say to them in my most convincing voice.

"Don't worry yourself with it Sev, just be calm and let us do it. Anyway, you can't-" Regulus starts.

"Reg, can I talk to you, it's urgent," Luka pulls Regulus away into the crowd before I can say or do anything. I look around blankly for a few seconds when suddenly-

"Severus! You came!" Lily runs up to me and pulls me into a tight hug before I can say anything. Realising the position I'm in, I hug her back.

"I'm so happy you're here, it's great!" She says. I manage somewhat of a smile in reply.

"Uh, where, where's James?" I stammer.

"James is getting drinks. Hopefully his friends will grab him and I'll have five minutes of peace. Are you enjoying tonight?" She seems to be extremely excited, as if she was charged by the dancing, band and possibly alcohol.

"Yeah, I, I love the setup, the band, the everything. It's amazing," I exaggerate as I don't want to sound like one of those people. You know, one of _those_ people.

"Do you have a date?" She asks me.

"No, I just came with Regulus and Luka," I curse myself under my breath. _What a stupid reply, how uncool and just...stupid._

"Oh alright. I'll save you a dance for later, I promise," she says encouragingly. "Unless you want to try your luck with someone?" She winks.

"Um, haha, I don't think I really, uh, really have what it takes," I say. Another stupid reply. _You're doing well tonight, aren't you?_

She gives me an encouraging smile. "Right, something tells me that James is wondering where I am. We'll talk later right?"

"Yes, yeah, yes, um, of course," I say. "Have fu- uh, enjoy," She nods and turns around and heads back towards the dance floor Shit. _I can't even talk to a girl, that's why they all hate me. I'm sure Lily's only pretending to like me as she feels sorry for me_. I start to make my way through the crowd to try and find Luka and Regulus. If I can't find them then I'm just going to leave. I really have no place here.

Suddenly, I spot them on the other side of the hall, talking to a couple girls in our year. I don't want to bring my awkward self into their conversation, so I don't go near them. Instead, I head over to the drinks table and pour myself a butterbeer.

"Hey, hey, you, are you in the fourth year?" A couple of second years come running up to me. "Um, yes," I say.

"Can you give us some firewhiskey? We're not allowed to take it," a girl in a pink dress asks.

"And what would I get in return?" I ask them, taking a sip of my beer.

"Um, uh, if you ever need a favour? Or maybe you can just be nice?" Pleads the boy standing next to the girl.

"No, fuck off," I say. Annoyed, they move towards the food. I don't feel like being nice right now. I look towards the dance floor. I recognise some people other than James and Lily but I ignore all of them.

I ignore James' friends cheering him on from the sidelines, I ignore the music, the flashing lights and the people around me. I ignore the other girl walking up towards James and Lily, looking angry- wait, no, I don't ignore her. I watch her push past other couples to make her way to James and Lily.

"James!" I can't describe how loud her scream is. Lots of people stop what they're doing and turn to look at her.

"What is wrong with you!?" She shouts almost as loud. Lily and James both look extremely confused.

"You told me we could go together! I show up late because of a problem and you do this?" She starts to cry and I see her makeup start to smudge and run down her face as she wipes it.

"I don't- what-" James looks around, absolutely confounded.

"James? Who is she?" Asks Lily. I can't tell whether she's angry, sad or confused. Probably all three.

"I don't- I swear I-"

"I'll tell you who I am Lily Evans! James asked me almost immediately after the ball was announced, and I accepted!" She shouts between sobs. "I arrived here late because I had a problem, I expected him to wait," She wails.

"Hey back off! You're lying!" Says Sirius. James' friends were all at his side. "Leave me and James alone!" She screams at them. She pushes a flabberghasted Lily aside and throws herself at James. "James is this true?" Lily's voice cracks a little as she says true.

James doesn't reply as he falls to the ground with the girl on top of him. I notice his friends and a couple of teachers try and pull her off as she tries to kiss him and hold him.

During all the commotion, no one except me notices Lily running out of the hall and up the stairs. I look around and spot Regulus. He mouths 'now's your chance, don't screw this up' and winks.

Making a mental note to kill him later, I take off after Lily.


	18. Chapter 18 Just one kiss

I see the end of Lily's dress disappear around a corner up the stairs and I follow her, trying not to keep too close. I am not sure if she's crying or not, the band started up again even louder to try and pick up where they left off after what just happened

 _This is a mista_ _ke, this is a mistake, this is a mistake, this is a mistake, this is a mistake, this is a huge mistake._

I follow her all the way up to the astronomy tower where she sits on the stairs with her head in her hands. Is she crying? No, no, she's not crying.

 _Should I be doing this? Is this the right thing to do?_

I stand only a few metres away from her, weighing my options.

 _Will she appreciate this? Will she hate me for this?_

Breathe in, breathe out.

 _You know what, fuck it._

"Lily? Are you alright?"

I turn the corner and she looks up at me. Her makeup is a bit smudged and her cheeks are flushed red.

"Oh, Severus, I didn't know you were here,"

She shifts to the side and taps the space next to her. I sit down. I have certainly not been this close to her for a long time, our legs and sides are touching.

"Thank you for coming up, I don't want to be alone. I don't know where my friends are, I don't know if they care or not,"

"Don't worry, anything for my friend," I say, returning her smile. I exhale, only just realising I was holding breath. _Stupid, what a fucking stupid, cheesy thing to say._

We sit in silence for a while.

"I thought James was, well, amazing. He's funny, charismatic, handsome, he does know how to impress a girl," she says, breaking the silence.

I do not reply, what I want to say is too rude and I do not want to ruin this moment we're having.

"I can't believe that he'd do that, he seems like a very loyal guy, he never seemed to me as someone who'd do that. I mean, we aren't dating, he just asked me and I accepted, because why the hell not? He's nice, and who knows, maybe we can have something else one day?"

I stlll don't say anything.

"But he asked me five days after the ball was announced, he must have asked that girl before, but why did he do that? Why didn't he tell me her he didn't want her after he asked her? And why did he even ask me in the first place?"

I consider my answer carefully. "He maybe realised that he prefers you over her? But it's true, he should have told her that he didn't want to go with her. But then again-"

"Lily? I promise what happene-"

"James, go away!" Screams Lily, cutting him off. James stands at the top of the stairs, panting.

"Lily, we can talk abou-"

"No, I do not want to talk about it James, please, go away!"

"Don't you hear her? She doesn't want to talk to you now," I say, defending my friend.

"And you accuse me of cheating?" He snarls, obviously referring to me being with her. "Fine. Good light Lily. Snape, you'll pay. You are behind this I'm sure."

With that, he turns and heads back.

Lily leans into my chest and starts sobbing. I gingerly wrap my hands around her and hold her to me. She doesn't try and pull back so I don't let go, I am not usually someone who hugs but now I'm willing to make the exception. Neither of us say anything, but I can tell that she is calming down, her breaths are becoming slower and more even. I encourage that by taking deep breaths, and she follows suit.

"Lily, don't believe what he says. He's just trying to justify what he did to you," I say as reassuringly as possible.

She pulls back and looks at me. I still have an arm around her.

"I won't. I can't believe he has the audacity to accuse me of cheating just because I'm with here sitting with you, it's totally unfair. He's just jealous,"

She wipes a tear from her eye.

"You don't deserve someone who'll do that to you. He doesn't deserve someone as wonderful and as beautiful as you. He doesn't deserve someone as dedicated, passionate and intelligent as you," I say, quietly. I have never complimented her like that before.

 _Fucking hell, why are you so cliché? She's gonna hate you for saying these things you know. You messed up._

She doesn't say anything, she just looks at me. I move her hand around her shoulder and cup her face with it, my fingers against her cheek and her jaw. She doesn't oppose to this.

My heart thumps in my chest. She puts her hand on my shoulder.

The next thing I do, I could regret for many years later. But what the hell. You only live once.

It wasn't only me, it was her. I looked at her, she looked at me. I lean forward, she leans forward. Next thing I know, her lips are on mine.

For five seconds we stay like this. For five seconds, the rest of the world doesn't exist. For five seconds, James, the ball, the shouting, all those things didn't exist.

It's just us and the moment.

Too little time passes before she looks at me. I am unable to keep myself from smiling, and I make eye contact, hoping for her to return it.

I do not get a smile though, instead, I get something very different.

"No, no, I'm sorry Severus, no," she doesn't say it in an angry tone, but in a sad, regretful one.

"Lily?"

She stands up and shakes her head. I try and take her hand, but she recoils it.

"I'm sorry Severus, I can't really, it's me, not you, really,"

She backs away. I can see tears forming in her eyes once again,

"I'm really sorry Severus, please, forgive me,"

She turns and runs down the stairs, her head in her hands.

"I'm sorry," I whisper under my breath.

I don't do anything but stare directly ahead of me, the feeling of her lips on mine still lingering.


End file.
